Package to my princess

Today I mailed off a package to our princess.  Since she is in a foster home and not the orphanage we were given permission to mail things to her at the foundation the home falls under.  I hope the packate  makes it to her. 

I put together a video with pictures and video from the holidays.  I read that our daughter loves music so I had the kids sing different songs like Isty Bitsy Spider, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star and some Christmas songs.  I bet she will love watching kids sing to her.  I know she is too little to comprehend that we are her forever family but at least we have a memory documented for her.

It breaks my heart to think of her having to leave the family that  raised her from 2 months of age until we travel (she will be about 20 months when we travel).  I hate for her to have to leave a familiar place to go with unfamiliar people/places - but she is meant to be with us:).  She will probably not remember this when she is older and having been where she is will help her do so much better bonding with us. 

I pray for the foster family that they will continue to stay in touch with us and that they will continue to foster kids...knowing that they made a difference in these kids lives.

TodayI filled out our I800 paperwork so it is ready to send to our agency with our LOA whenever it arrives.  It should come anytime between the second and third week of January.  Earlier would be nice!  Until then, we wait, not so patiently to travel to get our princess. 

Holiday Times

 I was admiring another blogger (also named Jennifer:) and her kids photos..envy, is what I have:)  No matter how hard we try or where we are I cannot for the life of me get all my kids to smile at the same time.   You would think Santa and Mrs. Claus and Great Wolfe Lodge would do it..no (probably too tired to smile from all that swimming and in the kids defense the candy canes tasted like medicine.  But I guarantee they had fun!  They never stopped swimming for a second.

At home on the cozy couch where we take all our pictures..not sure why but that is what always happens...no, but almost:)

Back at Great Wolfe lodge, nope, even though this was taken before we hit the slides and waterpark, you think the sheer anticipation would be enough...but there is always one who looks like she was taken hostage and another who just refuses to smile (yes, thats you Judah, little man) Of course I was the "one" who always cried for photos when I was a kid, so I understand.

Oh well, even without captured smiles, they did smile alot and they had a great Christmas.  All Adam kept saying was "this is the best Christmas I ever had"....which is sweet and sad all at the same time, considering its really the first Christmas he has ever had...

Off into the New Year soon in hopes of that coveted LOA -we sure felt an empty place this year for our sweet Elizabeth but know in our hearts she is being so loved by her foster family and are grateful for that love and together.  And we know she too shall be home to add to our picture, only I suspect she will be all smiles:)  I know I will:)

LID

What more is there to say than YAYAYAYAY we are officially logged in as of December 16th!

Does this fluidity ever end?

Seriously - the one thing I hate about adoption is that it is ever changing!  Nothing is normal.  Today I got an email from our social workers agency saying we had to pay upfront all of our post adoption reports....$2400.  This was unexpected since we are already paying our adoption agency a fee to ensure we do all of our post adoption reports.  Rgh...with our last adoptions we did not have to pay upfront for the reports..we paid as we went.SOOOOO thats $2400 we did not intend of having to spend until after we came home with our princess.  We are still fighting with the IRS to get our 2010 tax return and who knows what 2011 return has for us. 
Needless to say today I feel defeated.  I am busting my behind and making little progress.  Yes, I do know God is in control, and yes I do know it will all work out, but I am pretty sure he is putting some of the responsiblity on us to make it happen...so I feel tired, useless and defeated at the moment.
It is not fun being caught in the middle -we make enough money to easily take care of our children, but we don't have $25,000 laying around, nor do we qualify for any grants.  So back to the grind stone -with as much peace as I can have in my heart knowing my God is greater than this small task.
 Does anyone else ever feel this way ever?!  I am pretty sure I am not alone, which motivates me to keep on keepin on....I will not stop until not only this baby is home, but all the other children in the world are home where they belong. (don't worry I will not try to adopt them all - I would if I could:)

Grandbaby!

Wow what a week!  Not only did our dossier make it to China but our grandson was born and I got to be part of the birth!  It was amazing, my daughter was a trooper and my son in law so very kind to let me be in the room and even cut the cord!  Welcome to the world little man! 

DTC!!!

We are DTC as of today!!! Yayayayaay!  Now we obviously hope for a quick LID and LOA/LOC...if we can pull that all off before we might actually travel by May of 2012...that would be awesome!  What a great day!